allonlinenovel Chapter 24 Being a Happy Village Guardian (1)
Chapter 24 Being a Happy Village Guardian (1)
"You idiot, are you looking for death?" Zhao Degang angrily raised his hand to slap him.
This little bastard has been bullied by them since he was a child. They've never seen him fight back, let alone heard him spout so much nonsense.
In the past, even when Wang Sanzhu was beaten, he would only smile at them. Today, he actually dared to make them drink urine. He must be tired of living!
Before Zhao Degang's slap could land, Su Dingding slapped him twice first.
"Zhao the Fool, are your grandpa's hands big? Does it hurt when he hits you?" Su Dingding jumped and bounced in the water, laughing very loudly.
Zhao Degang was stunned by the beating, covering his face and looking at the arrogant fool in front of him in disbelief.
Could it be that Wang Sanzhu's brain was damaged by him and he doesn't know who he is?
"Fool! My dad is the village chief! You dare hit me? Believe me, I'll have my dad kick you and your dad out of Sheshui Village!" Zhao Degang roared.
"I am your father..."
Su Dingding laughed so hard she almost fell over, happily kicking her legs in the water.
Zhao Degang clenched his fist, wanting to teach him a lesson, but as soon as he got close, Su Dingding kicked him squarely.
"Ouch!" Zhao Degang clutched his genitals and immediately knelt in the river.
The excruciating pain made him feel like he was half dead; he trembled all over, and his forehead was covered in cold sweat.
Su Dingding held his head and jumped over it.
Zhao Degang was completely submerged in the river, and almost choked to death.
Er Dongzi came to his rescue, but was also kicked by Su Dingding seemingly unintentionally.
With a loud "Ouch!", Er Dongzi's hemorrhoids were kicked open, and blood immediately appeared below his body.
"Holy shit! Er Dongzi, you're a woman!"
"You're the woman, my ass is raw..."
Before Da Cheng could laugh at him, he also felt a tightness in his chrysanthemum and howled.
It hurts, it hurts so much!
"This is so much fun! You're all women now!" Su Dingding exclaimed excitedly, brushing aside her hair that had been covering her face. "My dear sisters-in-law, will you be my wives? I promise I'll take good care of you!"
"You idiot, if you utter another word of nonsense, I'll tear your mouth apart!"
"Ouch, I think I really can't take it anymore, it hurts so much..."
"I dare not move, it seems to be broken..."
Zhao Degang ignored the other two and walked shakily toward the shore.
He's gone mad, Wang Sanzhu is missing his wife so much he's gone crazy!
They actually dared to try and turn them into women, and even wanted to marry them all! They're fucking inhuman!
When he reached the shore, he discovered that his clothes were gone.
"Where are our clothes?" Zhao Degang glared angrily at Su Dingding. "You idiot, did you do it?"
"Who did I do?" Su Dingding asked loudly, looking completely bewildered.
"You son of a bitch, you stupid idiot, I don't need to ask you anything, you're out of your mind, go eat shit!" Zhao Degang cursed and looked around for his clothes.
"I can't do it anymore, Sister-in-law Zhao can't do it anymore!" Su Dingding skipped and jumped out of the river and came to the shore.
Zhao Degang intended to strip Wang Sanzhu of his clothes, but Wang Sanzhu ran too fast and Zhao Degang couldn't catch up.
They were all in their early twenties, and they were a little embarrassed to go back to the village wearing just briefs.
Left with no other choice, the group broke off some tree branches to cover themselves as they made their way back to the village.
It was midday, after all, and everyone in the village should be at home. If they were lucky, no one should have seen it.
What they didn't expect was that Su Dingding started shouting as soon as he returned to the village, waking up the villagers who were taking a midday nap.
They went outside and looked at Wang Sanzhu's madness with a strange expression.
"Silly Pillar is usually quite quiet, what's wrong with him today?"
"Could it be that Zhao Degang damaged his brain?"
"I think he's possessed by a ghost. Look how he jumps three feet high and how scary he is, baring his teeth and claws."
"Let's go, let's see what he's up to..."
Besides working in the fields, the villagers' biggest form of entertainment is gathering under the century-old willow tree at the village entrance and chatting nonsense.
They walked and talked amongst themselves, but before they reached the big tree, they saw Zhao Degang and two others walking towards them from a distance.
Several women exclaimed in surprise, "Oh no, this is so embarrassing!"
The surrounding area was quite open, and the three young men had nowhere to hide, so they had no choice but to grit their teeth and keep going.
"What are you all looking at? I'm not naked!"
"Aunt Song, you're making such a racket, what's wrong? You want to touch me a couple of times?"
Aunt Song blushed and looked timidly at Uncle Song.
"Snapped!"
Grandpa Song's face darkened, and he slapped Grandma Song across the face, then proceeded to punch and kick her repeatedly.
"You damned woman, aren't you afraid of getting corns? If you dare to look around again, I'll poke your eyes out!"
Grandpa Song was injured a few years ago and lost his ability, so he kept a very close eye on Grandma Song. She would be beaten if she spoke a word to any man in the village.
The others covered their mouths and chuckled, unsurprised by the sight.
No one tried to break up the fight; everyone just stood in the shade of the tree watching the spectacle.
Er Dongzi and Da Cheng's father picked up sticks and, cursing, chased their sons back home.
Zhao Degang simply stripped someone of their clothes and put them around his waist, then glanced coldly at the beaten Aunt Song.
His new wife has been bleeding for the past two days, and he hasn't consummated the marriage yet because he thinks it's dirty. Today, he's determined to see if he can succeed.
The kick he received earlier still hurts terribly; he doesn't want to become a cripple like Grandpa Song.
Sitting on the century-old willow tree, Su Dingding looked at the hornet's nest not far from her and revealed a sly smile.
"Gangzi, this is a really good thing!"
【Host, please be careful!】 Gangzi laughed along with him.
More and more people gathered under the century-old willow tree when suddenly something fell from above and hit Zhao Degang on the head as he was about to leave.
He cried out "Ouch!" and was about to start cursing when he saw a swarm of wasps fly out.
Everyone screamed in terror and scattered in all directions.
The wasps, of course, wouldn't let them get away with it and gave it their all in the pursuit.
"Charge! Charge!" Su Dingding shouted, raising his arm from the tree to direct the wasps.
Zhao Degang, who was shirtless, was stung the most; his entire face was swollen.
In the end, if he hadn't had the quick thinking to jump into Grandpa Li's cesspool and escaped death, he probably wouldn't have survived.
Everyone else was also stung by wasps to varying degrees, and they sat at home complaining of the pain while cursing Wang Sanzhu.
“I saw it clearly. The idiot was in the tree at the time, and he was the one who poked the hornet's nest.”
"I've always said that Sha Zhuzi is a menace; Zhao Degang should have beaten him to death!"
"I'm definitely going to settle this score with Wang Facai later, it hurts so much..."
Village chief Zhao Zhi was heartbroken to see his son covered in excrement.
It took several buckets of well water to clean him up.
But no matter what, he always smelled terrible.
Zhao Degang lay on the kang (a heated brick bed), his whole body aching, and he hated Wang Sanzhu to the core.
"Father, it's all that damned idiot Zhu's fault! You have to help me get revenge!"
As Zhao Zhi filled his pipe with tobacco, he comforted his son, "Gangzi, take good care of yourself. I won't let him get away with this!"